Putting an End to the Snark - Speak Life

Each year, fans and critics a like have a lot to say about the talent portion of the Miss America competition. This year was no exception, with many folks either loving, or hating, Miss Colorado, Kelley Johnson's original monologue. In it, Johnson raises awareness about the impact of Alzheimer's Disease on both patients and the nurses that care for them. Personally, I thought she did a great job with her speech.

But, the ladies on The View disagreed. Not only did they not like Johnson's speech, they were rather mean, and petty, when expressing their dislike. You can watch a clip of the comments that they made on their show here:

Now, I am not going to waste your time with a rehash of what they said or how I feel about it. Many people have already made their feelings quite well  known. I've seen a lot of great points made by many others, and I think one of the best is a post by Kateri:

An Open Letter to Joy Behar

What I want to focus on in my personal post is this observation: the hyper-critical comments that Behar and the other ladies of The View made are, sadly, nothing new in our public discourse. 

Personally, I've found that the attitude that was expressed on The View in this clip is all to common in our talk shows, news programs and other media. Now, I personally have a sarcastic sense of humor, but even I find this trend towards mocking people that is now found everywhere in our public society to just be snarky and mean spirited, especially when it's women putting other women down - it's just too much.

Maybe it's just me, but in the last few years, we, as a country, have become a lot less civil and polite, and people are just mean and rude so that they can get a laugh, or ratings or whatever. It just seems like the women on The View attacked Johnson because she came across as being a nice and caring human being.  I don't know when it became such a crime in this country for people to be "nice" and try to help others and care for others and to talk about helping others and caring for them. 

So, when I hear comments like those in this clip on The View, I can feel my eyes start to roll up in my head as I think, Why do you have to be so snarky,Women From The View? What do you get out of being so mean and putting someone down?

When I hear others, or even myself, (because as I mentioned before, I can be pretty sarcastic at times), I've learned to take a step back and really listen to the emotion that is underlying and hidden in a smart-alecky, snarky comment. When I take a step back and listen to that emotion behind a mean comment, I am reminded of this scripture in the Holy Bible: 

Proverbs 18:21 (KJV)

"Death and Life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof."

I think all of us forget that sometimes. Words are powerful. If you believe what is written in the Bible, then you know that the Lord literally spoke the universe into being. Even other religious traditions believe something similar, saying that it was "sung" into existence. 

Many do not realize it, but each of us literally does has the power to manifest things into being simply by speaking them out loud. So, why waste our power? Why say mean, snarky things? Why speak Death? Why not speak Life? 

Don't believe me yet? Let me ask you this question, and really think about it before you answer. Do you think you will have a good or bad day today? Guess what, regardless of which way you answer, you will be right! We each have an uncanny knack for finding what we are looking for. 

So, go out there and find something good, do something good, make it a good day, and speak Life!

It is like that old parable of having two beings inside of us. Some say it's two men, others say it's a wolf and a sheep, it varies depending on the culture and person telling the story. But the gist of it is that each of us has two natures inside of us, two people, a positive one and a negative one - guess which one grows - that's right, the one that you feed the most! So, in the grand scheme of things, why do the women on The View feel as though they have a right to say snarky things? Why is our public discourse becoming so negative and mean spirited? That's right, it's us, we feed the negative, we listen to it and we give it a place in our hearts and minds. 

The good news is that you don't have to continue to live this way. If you've been like me and laughed at, or even said, some mean, snarky things in the past, the good news is that you and I don't have to stay that way. You can stop speaking death, you can start sowing the seeds of life.

It starts with small things, but it starts with a personal decision, a conscious decision to stop speaking death and start speaking life. 

If you are like me, and you are really just sick and tired of all the negativity, I invite you to join me in changing the channel. Not just on the TV, but in every area of your life. Just say no to going negative. Changing the world really is that simple, it begins with changing how we speak to each other and about one another.

Come on, say it out loud with me, No! I am going to stop going there. I am going to start choosing Life. I am going to start looking for the good and I am going to start speaking Life!

It's a bright new day - here is to reaping the harvest of speaking Life!

Photo Credit: Flickr, Matthew Fang

Time Management

Do you have enough time? Yeah, me neither. No matter how well I plan, how early I go to bed, how many lists I make or people I recruit to help me with the various tasks that need to get done each day, I never seem to have enough time. 

One of the reasons why I am chronically short of time is that I am just very busy and have a lot of responsibilities and few resources. Another reason is that I have some chronic, serious and debilitating health concerns that take up a lot of energy, money and time. I am also the world's worst for not saying no and taking on too many responsibilities and putting too many irons in the fire. If I am honest with myself though, I have to admit that one of the real reasons why I am often short of time is that I am a bit of a day dreamer and a procrastinator. In short, my time management skills suck!

I've been a freelance commercial writer for a little over four years now, and aside from being able to write well,  I would have to say that time management is the one other skill that you absolutely must have. Indeed, whether you want to be able to make a living with the income that you earn from your writing or if you just want to be successful in any other area or occupation of your life, time management is probably the most important skill of all to have if you want to be successful.  

Some people seem to be just magically born with the ability to be super-productive because they are somehow blessed with the ability to manage their time. These creatures are always organized and pulled together each day because they somehow intuitively just KNOW how to manage their time. My husband is one of these mythical beings - and it annoys the crap out of me! Almost as much as my daydreaming and procrastination annoy him!

Today, I think I found a solution to my dilemma. Since I know several writers that share in my predicament, that are held back by their inability to manage their time well, I thought I would share the solution:

It is not enough to WANT to be able to manage your time. Good intentions are not enough! To be able to manage your time wisely, you must first LEARN and be TAUGHT, rather than TOLD, how to manage your time. 

Yes, I am talking about the S word - School!

As some of my readers know, I am a big fan of education, especially when it's free. Coursera is currently offering a free class on improving your time management skills. It's called:

Work Smarter, Not Harder: Time Management for Personal & Professional Productivity and is offered by by University of California, Irvine.

I recently had a bad flare of one of my health conditions and fell behind on my work, and so, as a final act of desperation, I thought I would see if there is actually a way to learn how to manage my time more effectively so that I can learn how to get more done each day without working 20+ hour days every day of my life. 

If you are like me and have trouble maintaining your focus, getting and staying organized, or just getting enough things accomplished each day without wanting to pull your hair out at the end, why not sign up and join me? It's free and you have nothing to lose and everything to gain! 

Photo Credit: Flickr: Bobby McKay, catching up.